Norway, Norhow
by Love Robin
Summary: After *A Sitch in Time* everything was reset back to normal.  No harm.  No foul.  Right?  Wrong.  Ron left more than his heart in Scandinavia, and now she's come looking for her Dream Man…  Might upgrade to M later.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Kim Possible and company. They are owned by Disney and Mark McCorkle and Bob Schooley. The name "Valkyrie 'Val' Halla" and other details as applied to this Background Character, as well as any original characters shown or mentioned belong to me and can not be used without permission. Okay? Many thanks to _KP Slash Haven_ member _Pesterfield,_ the Producer for this fic.

**Norway, Norhow**

Chapter One – _Little Drømmer Boy_

With a full fledged blizzard raging around them, it had only been Providence of the Gods which allowed them to stumble across a sizable snowdrift, surprising as the storm had caught them out on the lake's frozen surface. As such features were not generally encountered on flat expanses of ice, whatever it was which the mound had started and grown around, it meant both they were close to land, and their chances of survival significantly improved.

Digging into the mound's side, she began excavating a cavity, like a huge rabbit burrow, packing snow to reinforce the interior walls. Catching on quick, her companion helped as best he could, pulling snow in behind himself as he followed her inside. In short order they were inside a cramped but serviceable little den, leaving only a hole the diameter of his fist for ventilation. He dug a glow-stick from a parka pocket, bending and shaking to activate, bathing them in a sickly green light.

With temperature rising due to their breath and body warmth, interior walls already melting and refreezing into an icy shell further insulating and trapping heat, the air still held a considerable chill. Meaning more was required.

Divesting herself of her thick coat, laying it out on the frigid ground as an insulating mat, she quickly began to strip down, urging the American to do the same. She was slipping her sweater over her head just as he finally began to follow suit. Although she had a head start on him, it was with a certain amount of eagerness with which he moved, removing the last bit of outerwear as she started on her unders.

Seeing that he actually surpassed her, down to his socks in seconds. Of course, she had been taking time to arrange their cast-offs underneath, so he had a slight unfair advantage. Still she smiled, recognizing the boyish intent and eagerness cause yes, it was going to come to _that… ._

Adjusting his clothing and coat as side insulation and blanket, she pulled him under with her. With his arms cinched about her, his hands trying to be respectful while thumbs lightly yet actively grazed the underside of her breasts, she had to admit fantasies had been made about this. _Pornos_ had been made about this. She clucked internally, a bit sorry to be adding to the stereotype of Sexy Blonde Swedish Bombshell. Even if she _was_ Norwegian, to Americans and most of the world both were Scandinavian, and that was about as far as the distinction went. Of course the reality of a real life or death situation dampened things, but only a bit.

It was just survival. They were going to have have to wait out the rest of the storm. Hugging close would keep them warm and it was cold enough to matter. The air was warming by the minute, yet it would not come even close to comfortable. One could survive.

_Two _could_ enjoy…_

She had met his little pet rodent, and as she was fairly certain it had burrowed into an inside coat pocket, it meant what she was feeling poking at her back was not him. More than the space around them was starting to warm up for both teens. Snuggling a little tighter into his embrace, she wiggled her hips to settle things into position. Then lifting top leg a bit, shifting further, she slid him into place…

* * *

Val Halla woke abruptly, as had been customary for the past several months ever since becoming pregnant. At first branded a slut by friends, family, and all she met, her protestations of being still a virgin without having ever having so much a boyfriend much less sex fell upon deaf ears, her own parents ready to disown her. It was only by the confirmation of intact hymen by her gynecologist and several consulting doctors which saved her reputation.

In fact, saw her proclaimed a miracle.

Immaculate conception.

_Touched of the Gods._

She had made the news. Some believed and some scoffed and she cared not which. All she knew was she loved and intended to keep her babies.

Every night the dreams came. Not always the same, yet with a consistency even hypnosis could not shake. Six months, that was the period of time covered by her nightly visions, each featuring and centered upon the same nameless blond young man, his eyes – which she knew to be warm and inviting – hidden by shadows impossible for his hair to cast. However none of it had occurred, even if several things glimpsed in the backgrounds came true.

Game scores; lottery numbers; and small other small things and events in the lives of people she knew about her.

To the distaste of the local church, a small religion – almost a cult – sprung up about her. People flocked to her, each clamoring for a moment of her time, for a benediction, for a momentary touch. From abundant gifts of things and monetary contributions, Val no longer wanted for anything.

Except for filling a hole in her soul the shape of an imaginary boy in her dreams, whom she believed – knew – to be the father of her unborn twins.

The blonde looked around, struggling to sit up despite the obstacle her swollen stomach presented. The television, always left on for the company of its sound, was just finishing a news blurb about the redheaded American Kim Possible in yet another of her unrealistic sounding exploits. _I should call _Mythmusters, _have them put her 'to the test',_ she thought, starting to get up for the bathroom when something on screen caught her attention.

Scrambling for the remote, Val paused the digitally streamed programming, clicking the two-second rewind a few times before stepping frame-by-frame to what she spied.

_There!_

Val waddled to the set, dropping to her knees, resting her woefully spreading ass on her calves, bladder ready to release on the spot and she not caring. Left arm cradling stomach, with a hesitant right hand she touched the screen where off to one side, barely half in the shot, stood a blond boy achingly familiar.

"He's real…," half whispering in awe, Valkyrie read the captioning, finally having a name to go with the face, _"…Ron Stoppable…"_

* * *

Kim had just left her front door, her destination next door to Ron's. As she walked the brief distance, a taxi pulled up. By the time she got there, the passenger, a young blonde woman, was paying the driver after he emptied the trunk of several bags. As she was reaching into the back of the vehicle after something else, it seemed like she might could use some assistance. Despite being best known for saving the world, Kim still got cats from trees. So helping somebody out of a cab certainly was not beneath her.

Stepping up behind her, "Hi! Can I help?"

Semi-startled, the blonde straightened, staring back evenly. "Oh. Hello," she said in a mild accent which had Scandinavian all over it. "You are Kim Possible." It was a statement.

"Guilty as charged!" the redhead shrugged in her 'pleased yet trying to be modest' manner. "Can I take anything?"

Val half expected this. It had only been doctor's orders which kept her from hopping aboard a plane immediately after that newscast. Then once the twins were born it took a few months to get the required immunizations and documents needed for travel.

However the time was not wasted. She had done her research, and had been upset to find Ron rarely mentioned except maybe as a footnote in a Kim Possible story, often times with name misspelled. She also used the time to get back into shape, which shape she hoped he remembered her with, even if only in unexplained dreams.

Finally the time came and she was here, in America, in Colorado, in Middleton, with her two children to introduce them to their father. She knew he lived here. Where research had failed, her dreams took her to the right house. With each step closer, as each barely remembered tidbit found shape in reality, the more concrete things became. Such as how he had often talked wistfully about home – and the friend he left behind.

The redhead standing in front of her.

"Yes, can I take anything?"

Val was unsure what to think of Kim. Her dreams revealed the devotion Ron had to the redhead before turning that devotion to her. Yet the news had shown her treating the boy as an afterthought – if he was mentioned at all – but that might just be the news being slanted.

However, for all the blonde seemed lost in thought, it had been the briefest of moments, for she wordlessly once again bent into the cab, turning to perfunctorily hand Kim a baby girl before working to get another infant the same age, close the door, and tilt her stacked luggage onto their wheels.

Although surprised, years of babysitting instincts took over as Kim shifted the little girl in a comfortable hold. She stepped in to take control of a second set of piled bags, wheeling up to the house after her. "Who are you visiting?"

"Ron Stoppable," came the flat answer. Once having looked the other in the eyes, something there said she would be seen as an unwelcome interloper, so Val had no desire to say more. Especially about the twins and his being their father. Even if Kim Possible would probably be present when she did so, she wanted to deliver the news to Ron herself. First.

For her part, Kim was taken aback. Surprised by the answer and a little worried. If relatives were coming to visit, Ron's parents would probably want him to stay in. Idly she wondered if this would be a surprise to them, or if, as usual, this was their way of telling Ron they had company coming.

Either way it probably meant the night was off.

The little girl in her arms beginning to fuss, the world-saving babysitter gently jiggled her while wondering just how the young woman was related to the Stoppables. _Another cousin maybe?_

The two girls approached the Stoppable's front door, pulling the bags up the blue stairs. As Ron had been expecting Kim's arrival, she was not surprised it was he who opened it after the first ring of the bell. _Eager for Bueno Nacho as usual…I hope our plans don't get too messed up._

Val had been considering for a while how she would greet this Not-So-Stranger, going over in her head how things would proceed, practicing her introduction endlessly. Yet with the moment arrived, the man of her dreams made flesh before her, all conscious decision gave way to her subconscious and her body.

Both which said they were lovers who had not seen each other for months.

Kim looked up from readjusting the baby in her arms upon hearing the other crying. The reason for his squalling was due to being squeezed between two bodies, his mother's… and Ron's. On tip-toes, the petite blonde had flung an arm about his neck and pulled him into a tight embrace.

She was also doing a fair job of trying to taste his tonsils.

"I've heard of kissing cousins, but _tongue_ is going too far! _Something you want to say Ron?"_

If her best friend heard her, he was unable to answer at the moment, which had nothing to do with the usual Ron-weirdness, and everything to do with the normal reaction of a teen boy who had a hot girl's tongue exploring his mouth.

Which could not last long as the infant's crying forced them to break apart and young mother turn her attention to cooing to her son.

"Ron! Who is she?" Kim winced a bit as the one she was holding, playfully grabbed a bit of stray hair. "And who are they?"

As Val cooed apologies to her squalling boy for the brief crushing press between their bodies, Ron stood in partial shock, eyes glazing over. With a couple of fingertips he touched his tingling lips as they curved into a sap-happy smile, _She had pancakes with lingonberry syrup for lunch!_ Only able to watch the Nordic vision in front of him, he failed to notice Kim off to the side, a second baby in her arms, with features visibly darkening.

If life were like a cartoon, a storm cloud complete with little lightening bolts would have been forming above her head.

For her part, Kim was unsure of the emotions roiling through her. On the one hand she had no exclusive claim to Ron beyond their friendship for life, so he was of course free to date. In fact had been dating Zita for several months, and she rather liked the Latina as a very comfortable match for him. Which made her as equally upset as he when she up and disappeared back to Brazil with her mother nearly a year prior.

In addition, Kim was reasonably sure something had happened while helping with her Nana settle into a new assisted living residence in Florida during last year's Spring Break. Not that Ron said anything, but for their final three days there he had spent a lot of time with a certain pair of college girls, Missy and Sippy. She suspected he hooked up with one of them, but could not discern which as the girls were hardly ever apart. The concept of his managing to snag both at once was so absurd she dismissed it out of hand the moment the idea popped into her head. Yet he _did_ spend that final weekend with a _very_ sappy grin plastered to his face.

The same one he wore now.

However on the other hand, it was Friday, and Fridays were her official unofficial Ron Night. Not that she shared the same love for Bueno Nacho as he did, but following him to his favorite haunt the same way he followed her on dangerous missions all the time was a small price to pay in way of a thank you. So she should be upset over _anything_ which disrupted her expressing appreciation to her Best Friend.

Right?

"Ron," Kim repeated in almost a growl, _"who _is she? And who…," indicating the two children, "…are they?"

As if for the first time, the blond realized the redhead's presence. "KP! Oh! Uhmmm, how long have you been standing there?"

Making a display of shifting the tiny girl to her other side, Kim replied frostily, "Long enough."

"Oh, yeah, heh heh, well this is… uhm, is… uhm…"

"Valkyrie Halla," the blonde offered, smiling brightly. No… _gleaming._ "Val."

Still pointedly addressing Ron, "And she is…?"

"She is…, is… blonde…, and…,"

"From Norway. Midgård."

"I didn't know you had any relatives in Norway."

"Uhm, I…," he glanced sideways at the perky girl who shook her head, "…don't…?"

"We are not related."

"Then exactly how is it you know each other?" Kim's brows creased, her female-sense tingling. "I mean, she pulled up in a cab looking specifically for you _by name._ Ron Stoppable."

"We know each other very well," Val supplied, knowing from the kiss and look in his eyes it was true. Somehow it was _all_ true. "Our souls are connected."

"_What_ now?"

"We know each other from our dreams."

"Really," Kim responded in the flattest tone she ever uttered. Indicating the two youngest ones present, "And these are…?"

The petite Nordic beauty turned, addressing Ron directly. "Ronald Stoppable, it is with the greatest of pride with which I, Valkyrie Halla, do present to you, hale and hearty, healthy and whole, Hans… and Hanne…," the last she pronounced 'han'eh', "your son and daughter…

"…our children."

Blinking rapidly, Kim took a look at the babies trying to estimate their age, thinking about which of their missions in northern Europe might have given Ron a chance to slip away around the right time. _None. Nearest was Rodigan, but that was closer to Liechtenstein than Norway, and a full year before._ She muttered, "Apparently you've known each other from more than just your dreams."

Val, meanwhile, took one of the stunned boy's arms, guiding him into the house. Now that she was here memories of the home he so often talked about and how it differed from his new one were gelling, so she had a good idea of the general layout which let her lead him to the couch.

With no real choice Kim followed, eyebrows cocked.

As easily lead as a lamb to slaughter, Val gently saw him seated, placing Hans into his arms. It hurt a bit to say they were unrelated, but it was the truth. Not even in her dreams after revealing to him her delicate state had they begun to discuss marriage. She knew they would have eventually since his response to the news had been to hug her fiercely while promising to be with her forever.

"Uhm, look…" Kim started, for some reason not wanting to relinquish her temporary charge. Somewhere in the back of her head she was not ready to give up that small bit of leverage.

"Valkyrie. Val."

"Yeah, look, Val… I realize you just got here and all, and must be tired. But we had plans to go out for something to eat…"

"Bueno Nacho's still on?" the boy exclaimed. "Booyah! Let's go!"

"A most excellent suggestioning!" the blonde enthused, understanding immediately what the redhead was trying to do and having none of it. "I shall just be grabbing a couple jars of baby food and we shall proceed."

Quickly calculating how things could turn against her by being rude, Kim opted instead for being helpful. "Great. Give me a minute and I'll just run home and get my brothers' old stroller. A twin seater."

"That would be very helpful," Val nodded.

The teen hero started to turn for the door, but the blonde gently but firmly extricated her daughter, turning to place her on Ron's other knee and taking a seat next to him.

Once outside, the redhead ran as swiftly as she could, whipping out her Kimmunicator. "Wade!"

"_Hey, Kim. Wassup?" _came back her genius friend's immediate response.

"I need you to perform a DNA scan of this sample," she scooped some of Hanne's drool on her shoulder with the device's collection tray, "and I need a result right away!"

"_On it, Kim. I'll get back to you as soon as I can."_

* * *

While Rufus worked his way through his Grande Sized Triple Naco Platter, Kim carefully observed Ron across the booth with his new 'hip attachment', who was splitting her time between taking bites of a burrito he held for her and spooning baby food to the little boy with her hair and eyes. It became obvious on the walk to the restaurant she knew a lot about him and was eager to learn even more. As much as the sidekick professed an unfamiliarity with the girl, they were in tune to each other to an astonishing degree. Not only animatedly finishing each other's sentences, but occasionally Ron would let slip brief phrases in her language. Kim doubted he even realized it.

In fact, she reflected, he had been doing that for nearly a year now…, _Hmm, just about the time she would have to have gotten pregnant…,_ Ron would occasionally say something in another language. When called on it, he had been unaware doing so and would dismiss it as something French he must have picked up during his family vacation to Paris. Which might have made sense had Wade not run a tape of one of the lapses through a translation routine to find it was Norwegian. _Curiouser and curiouser._

A bit of fussing at her elbow pulled her attention to the little girl with a full head of hair the same straw color as Ron's. She also had his warm brown eyes. "What was that? Does Hanne want some more?"

Taking a leg kick and bubbly coo as an answer in the affirmative, the world-saving babysitter took a moment from picking at her own Southern Border Style Salad to serve up another mouthful of pureed split peas to the child, wiping the excess with the rubber-coated baby-spoon's edge. "Mmmm, how do you say 'yummy' in Norway?"

Although Kim was obviously talking to Hanne and not expecting an answer, Val responded, "Actually, it is still 'yummy'." The Scandinavian accent, which was not all that thick, made it 'you'meh'.

Mustering up a smile, "Ah, well, I suppose baby sounds are the same in all languages."

"_Jeg takker deg for å hjelpe. Noen ganger er det vanskelig å mate begge samtidig."_ When Kim blinked blankly, the blonde realized what she had done, "I am sorry. Sometimes I forget which I am speaking, and in Norway as everyone speaks it both it is not much of a problem. I said that I thank you for helping. Sometimes it is difficult to feed both at the same time."

"Ah! Well no problem, I don't mind," she said while spooning in another mouthful. "I love children… ." _And it's not like it's your fault your horndog daddy and slut mommy hooked up, now is it? Although when he could have manage that is still a mystery._

The teen hero jumped slightly when her hip buzzed. She had set the Kimmunicator to vibrate, just so when Wade called back she could…, "I have to dash to the ladies for a moment. Ron, think you could tear yourself away long enough to give your daughter a few?"

"Sure thing, KP."

Not looking back to see him changing sides by sliding under the table, she made a beeline to the bathroom as if she really did have to go. However, once locked in a stall, "Wade! What did you find out?"

On the PDA styled device's tiny screen the black boy stared back, _"I ran that sample of drool from your shoulder through a DNA analysis like you asked. Kim! I got an immediate hit from my on-hand library of samples! It's a perfect off-spring profile match for Ron."_

"How the _frak_ is that even _possible?_ He's a Stoppable, so it _shouldn't be_ possible. You know, 'everything's stoppable to a Stoppable', but you're telling me he somehow managed 'Rockets Are Go' with that Swedish Bikini teamer?"

"_Who?"_

"This blonde bimbo, says she's from Norway, shows up on Ron's doorstep with two three month old babies she says are his."

"_Well as amazing as it sounds, _Ron_ is that little girl's father."_

"And even if it was possible how did he get the time? They certainly aren't acting like a one-night stand."

Wade shrugged. _"Maybe it's a trick of some kind? A variation of the 'make Kim pregnant' plans I've seen pop up on villain sites now and then."_

"Really? Start looking into that. If it is we need to know who's behind it, and why. Also, do an in-depth background check on one Valkyrie 'Val' Halla of Midgård, Norway."

"_I'm all over it, Kim. I'll either call you back or stream you whatever I find shortly."_

"You rock, Wade." She was about to turn the Kimmunicator off when she did a slight double take. "Wait. A variation on _what_ plan?"

Wade looked more than a little abashed. Mainly that he let slip not only his habit of trolling forums frequented by villains, but revealing one of his favorite wank topics. There were some pretty perverse and kinky twists out there to that particular topic, many complete with 'fan art'. Some of the things postulated about Kim's private sex life were worthy of triple triple-X ratings.

He tried to dissemble, _"Uhm, nothing to be concerned about Kim. One of the more crank topics discusses the prevalence of American teenage girls to end up single mothers while still in school, and that should you end up a part of that statistic you'd be out of the world-saving game for a good six months to at least a year…"_

"Really now." Kim could tell he was nervous and holding something back. "Is that the extent of it?"

"_Well, it's not like they have practical discussions about retrovirus formulations and plans how best to inject you with their DNA. Or with Shego's DNA… or your father's…"_

"They don't."

"…_or in one case, your mother's…"_

"I think I just lost my appetite. But I still have to get back. I don't want to leave Ron alone with the Norwegian Nookie any longer than necessary."

"_Wow. What has you tweaked?"_

"I'm not jealous!"

"_Whoa. I didn't say you're jealou…"_

"Well I'm NOT, so get off my back and Drop It Already!" the redhead jabbed the disconnect button harder than was necessary. As squicked as she had been by the idea people were out there thinking up ways to make her pregnant, the last bit drove it completely from her mind. _I'm_ NOT _jealous! I've got _nothing_ to be jealous of! Over _Ron?_ Pfft, as if…_

It took two minutes of washing her face at the sink, using the mirror to ensure her 'game face' was in place, before she was ready to make back for the booth.

With her attention so focused on the happy little Sea of Domesticity the two blonds with children presented, she did not see a caramel-skinned girl practically ambush her barely two steps from the restrooms.

"Kim! OMG, ICBM-eyes, it's true!"

"Monique, what?"

"I Can't Believe My eyes Baby Girl, Ron _has_ a baby girl! And baby boy… I came as soon as I got the texts."

"Texts? What texts? Who's texting what to who?"

While guiding her friend to a nearby booth, the girl gestured with a chin toward the counter, behind which stood Ned busy slaving over a hot cellphone, his thumbs a blur. "It's all over Middleton that Ron has a double-baby-mama… wow, from here you can really see the family resemblances…"

"Oh great, like I need this too on top of everything else."

"Well?"

"Well what?"

"Don't make me Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, GF, WTF is she?"

"I wish I knew! All I know is she showed up unannounced, that her name is Val, that they'd never met before, but claims they're soulmates from their dreams, if you can believe that," scorn dripped from the redhead like hot grease.

Blink, "Dreams? Really? That's what Poon Hound is claiming? Really?"

"That's their story and they're sticking with it. Fact is, there was never any time they _could_ have met for a _minute_, much less the time needed for…"

"Don't underestimate how little time that really needs."

"But _when_, Monique?" Kim hissed. "Wade did a DNA match and they _are_ his, but Ron's never even _been_ to Norway, much less anywhere close by."

Her friend froze, blinking rapidly, "Norway?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Ohhh, Boy…"

"What?"

Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly while deciding how much to reveal of her family secret. "Now don't freak out, Baby Girl, but I'm about to tell you something I'm not supposed to breathe a word of outside my family…"

"You don't have to worry about me. You know I can keep a secret."

"Weeellll…," the girl let it out in one long breath; "A few select members of my family are psychic and can see the future and I'm one of them about a year ago Ron's family moved to Norway just before you disappeared for twenty years while Shego took over the world turning it into one giant green-and-black themed gulag of oppression while she scoured the globe looking for you until you and Ron showed up not a day older and broke her prized stone monkey of time-travel and suddenly everything was back to normal as if nothing ever happened."

Kim stared at her Best Female Friend with an open mouth for nearly a minute.

The black girl snapped fingers in her face. "Kim? GF? You get all that?"

"So _that's_ how she did it‼"

"Who? Shego?"

"Val. _That's_ how she got her _hooks_ into him…!"

"_That's_ all you take from all that?"

"You want I should call you a liar?"

"Well, no…"

"Get mad, say you're pulling my leg?"

"No, of cour…"

"Accuse you of covering for Ron and his bimbo?"

"Now you know I'd nev…"

"Then _what,_ Monique? _What_ am I supposed to _say_ after all that?"

"Girl, why are you jel'in'?"

"_I'm not jealous!"_

"You know, I'm actually surprised you're taking it this well."

At that moment the Kimmunicator buzzed again. This time Wade, as promised, had streamed to her a series of news articles and online video-bites. With Monique squeezing in tight to look on, the redhead scrolled through the material. Her computer genius had dug up enough collaborating articles about a Norwegian miraculous immaculate teen conception and virgin birth to push it into the realm of maybe not a fake.

Clicking it off, "Saying I believe all that…"

"And why shouldn't you?"

"Look, it's been a rough afternoon, alright? I have other concerns on my mind."

"Right, like your non-jel'in' jel'in'?"

"I'm _not_ jel'ing!"

"Mmm hmm," the fashion-minded friend crossed arms knowingly, "keep telling yourself that Baby Girl."

Ignoring that, Kim pressed on, "You really expect me to accept there was this whole sitch in time which no longer exists and only you and Ron remember…"

"I remember. Well, most of it… I think. I mean, if I forgot anything would I even be aware of what I forgot?" She had a far off look for a moment, then shook herself, "Anyway… I remember, but Ron only seems to have some sort of _deja vu_-like non-memory memory mostly about things Norway. Remember his tirade about how the social studies textbook had the wrong year for that battle which saw that king unite the Viking territories? It was off something like twenty-five some years and so his essay answer was really correct. Turned out he was right, remember?"

"Hum-mm, yeah…," the hero sat back, crossing her own arms, musing. "Now that you mention it, it was shortly before that he declared one morning he hated meatcakes."

"Yeah so?"

"After Wade identified Ron's Speaking in Tongues language, I did further research. Guess what is a popular cuisine style in Norway."

"Meatcakes."

"Right. I had just chalked it up to his Surprising Talent Number 34."

"Oh yeah! His chef-level cooking. I can't believe I miss _Chez Ro'nalds_. Boy could grill sump'in' _fierce_."

"So you're saying only you remember his folks packing up and moving to Norway."

Monique gestured across the restaurant, "Obviously I'm not the _only_ one."

"Val doesn't remember either."

"She remembered enough to get here. Right to his doorstep."

"But from a _dream_, Monique!"

"Girlfriend, it wasn't dreams which baked those two Ron-buns in her oven."

"It makes no sense! She meets Ron in another timeline reality, jumps his bones…"

"Why is _she_ the one doin' the jumpin'?"

"…and, when everything changes back, the slut somehow remains pregnant? How _dare_ she!"

"Oh, sure, you're not jel'in'. No, not at all…"

Back at the blond table, Hanne had finished her peas. From watching Kim and a little coaching from Val, Ron had quickly gotten the hang of it. Helped by the little girl being quite cooperative and laughing at his funny faces.

Val had to smile at the scene, her mind once more going to what things could have been like if Fate or whatever had decided not to play a cruel trick on them. Well, that was of little consequence now. She had found her Ron, and he appeared as happy to be found as she was to find him.

Meanwhile Kim was twisting a napkin around her finger. "Okay, so what if I am a little… jel'ing? How could he go off and do that!"

"From what I can remember of that other time, it was getting harder and harder for him to help you with missions. So it only makes sense you'd finally drift apart and he'd make new friends."

Pointing over at the table. "I don't think that's just friendship."

Monique nodded knowingly. "You two have known each other since Pre-K. Have you ever told him you wanted to bump your friendship to include benefits?"

Meanwhile, sitting back from tucking the twins in for a nap in the dual stroller, Val looked to her cooling food. The burrito Ron held while she nibbled had been tasty in a spicy way not too different from her native Tri-County Area's cuisine. Still, so out-of-the-way remote were they much of the world's foods were hard and expensive to come by. Even something as ubiquitous as a frozen burrito – ironic in that 'frozen' seemed like their chief resource virtually growing on trees – was heard of but unseen. Yet, it had held her hunger at bay while attending first the needs of Hans and Hanne. Now she wanted to experience Ron's invention, the Naco. Since arriving, the wispy memories were taking on more substance, just as once she learned his name and seeing his eyes they were no longer forgotten in her dreams, with the food in front of her, those details too gained solidity.

Looking up, she saw him watching intently as Rufus leapt from the table to the stroller's sunshade, curling into a restful yet alert ball. He had immediately taken to the infants as self-appointed guardian.

"What?"

"Who are you?"

A soft smile, "I have told ye, Silly, _mitt navn er_ Val. Valkyrie Halla."

"No, not your _name_," Ron waved it away as trivial.

"_Eg forstår ikkje," I don't understand._

"I mean, _who_ are you? That _you_ would be interested in _me_."

The girl's smile widened, "Ah. I have dreamt of you nightly from the moment I became pregnant. I… can hardly make sense of them other than in my dreams you saved my life, for which I repeatedly gave of myself to you soul and body."

A sappy grin, "Well naturally. I'm sure everyone dreams of the Ronshine, but few admit to it."

Taking up a spork, Val worked at targeting, separating and balancing a chip with some beans and sauce. Normally she would have just used her hands, and could see by both his example and those around them it was acceptable, however this was the first time eating in front of her soulmate, and first impressions were irrevocable. "As Hans and Hanne testify, there is more between us than _drømme_, dreams. Through however miracle, I have born you hale and hearty children, so the connection betwixt us is real and true. There are those back home, the _Vanatrú_, who feel you – _drømmer_ you – as _Vanr_… of the gods known as Vanir."

"As in like… Thor?" the youth frowned, concentrating to remember both myths and comic books. The latter coming easiest to him.

"_Nei._ Thor is Æsir. The Vanir are the gods to which wisdom, foreseer…," she blushed, a hand on her now flat again belly, "…_og_ fertility… are ascribed."

"Yeeaahhh… you don't have to tell me I'm special, but a god I'm sure I'm not. Someone would have told me." Then thinking about how his parents routinely withheld information, "Reasonably sure I'm not."

"Vanir, Æsir, _engel,_ or mortal, what I know is what I felt when we kissed."

"Oh, and what's that, Babe?"

"The power within you. Which I've felt through _mine drømme_." She glanced to the stroller, naked molerat still atop. "_Og_ in them…"

Sitting at the other table, neither of the blonds noticing she had yet to return, Kim stared at Monique. "We have benefits, Ron gets a lot from being my friend."

Monique quirked an eyebrow, she had been unaware of that.

Ticking off on fingers, "Travel, adventure, plenty of exercise… which he needs to work off the meals he eats at my house…"

"Those are benefits, sure, but I mean _benefits."_ It appeared further explanation was needed.

"_Monique!"_

Ned had been about to put away his phone when the outcry caused him to look toward Kim's table. A quick key press and he had a nice picture of the redheaded world-saver blushing as her friend made obscene hand gestures.

Unaware of the candid shot residing on Ned's phone as he tucked it away – he needed to carefully consider if it would be worth sending out, and if so how best to do so – Kim reached across the table, shoving her friend's 'poking hole' gesturing out of sight. "We're friends, scha, but I'm not going to give him _that_ kind of benefits!"

"You've been together since Pre-K and you've not done _nothing_ with him?"

"The answer to your question, is no, of course not," Kim seemed offended.

"What do you mean 'no of course not'? Have you let him do _anything?"_

"Yes!" Kim sniffed, "I've let him give me foot massages."

"Foot massages."

"And when we go to the movies, I let him hold my hand."

"Hold your hand? Really? That's it?"

"He gets scared easily and needs his hand held."

"So let me get this straight," the black girl hooked a thumb over her shoulder at the blonds, dropping her voice low knowing Kim did not fully approve of the language she was about to lay down and would not want others to overhear, "You're not fucking him, you're not sucking him, you're not giving him any tongue, but Darryl Hannah's stand in _is?_

"Girlfriend, you know I love you, but while you might be acting like you're still twelve years old with him, he is acting like a man. Before you can claim a nigga, you've got to _claim_ a nigga. Had you wanted to keep his interest, you needed to break him off a piece."

Kim was scandalized, "I'm not going to do _that!"_

"And so enters the Snow Bunny, who not only apparently will but obviously has," Monique sat back again.

"Okay, can we just take my sex life off the table?"

"Actually, it's Ron's sex life that's on the table, and your lack of one," smirked Monique. "Had you _put_ your sex life on a table in front of him, you wouldn't be lacking it to the Swiss Miss over there."

Kim had to think about that. A couple responses went though her head…

…_Sex had just seemed to never come up much, if at all, and in other things it's Ron who still acts like a twelve year old or younger. Example, needing his hand held at the movies…_

…_We've known each other since Pre-K, it would be like having sex with the tweebs…_

Finally opting for, "Could we stop talking about sex lives and tables in a restaurant?"

Across the way, Ron had heard the earlier exclamation, glancing over to see his two best friends talking away. "Hey, look's like Kim's back. And that's another friend of ours. Should we invite them back over?"

Val gave it careful consideration. This private time reacquainting herself – for the first time – with Ron, and introducing the twins to him was nice, but she knew she needed to meet more of his friends.

Unable to ignore Ron and Val's waving them over without seeming rude, Monique and Kim slid onto the bench after their friend once again slid under the table to change sides, the hero babysitter taking a moment to double check the little girl was securely tucked in. _Certainly no faulting her mothering instincts._

"Monique," Ron started the introduction, "this is Valkyrie Halla. She's from Norway."

"Val. Nice to be meeting you, Monique," outstretching a hand.

Taking it, darker skin in vivid contrast to paler, "Hi GF, WTM NTMY."

Blinking, pulling back her released hand, the newcomer shook her head, turning to Ron. "I am sorry…?"

"Oh, that's just Monique-speak. Don't sweat it, Babe, she does it all the time. I usually ignore it unless she translates for us."

Kim tapped her friend's shoulder. "You might dial it back a bit, or 'GF' here might think us less than welcoming!"

Chuckling, Monique smiled, "I'm sorry, I forget not everyone has my great mind... what I was saying was 'Hi girlfriend, welcome to Middleton, nice to meet you'."

"Oh. Well _ja,_ it would seem I am lacking a greatness of your mind," Val offered hesitantly. "Thanks to you for the greeting, it is nice to be meeting you as well.

"If she Mo-speaks with you, she is either accepting you as a friend or freezing you out as not." Kim glared sideways at her classmate.

"How does one tell the difference?"

Kim smirked, "She only translates for friends."

"I see," the blonde smiled. "We are friends, _ja_, since you translated?"

"Any friend of Ron's gets a chance, Sweetie," Monique returned the smile, "Say, you have niiice skin! Creamy, smooth, delicate, evenly toned. Hmm, good Slavic features, strong yet soft. Have you ever considered modeling? That sweater… it's nice, don't get me wrong… but it seems awfully warm for this climate. Bet I could swing you some free clothes for an afternoon's photo session and signed release form."

Out of sight under the table, Kim kicked her shin.

Val had no idea how long she be remaining in America. Now that she knew her dream man was real she was just starting to entertain thoughts about trying to get him back to Norway. Not that Colorado was not nice – and it was as close to the tropics she had ever been – but Norway had advantages.

However that was for the future. For now clothes more suited to the climate would be good and if things worked out, might even lead to something more. _"Ja,_ that would being nice."

Monique smiled, though it hid a slight grimace from the kick. Getting a new model could mean a bonus for her as well. On a personal note, it would give time to talk to the girl away from Ron and hopefully Kim as well. "Great! I'll need to do some schedule checking and get back to you. Where will you be staying?"

"With Ron."

Monique could tell by her slight stiffening that Kim was tweaking over the thought of the newcomer staying at Ron's house. As much as she wanted to show her best friend some solidarity, fact was not only had she been treating the boy too poorly to expect any exclusivity from him… _You snooze you lose, Girlfriend!_ …but _he_ was her friend too. As such she had some measure of duty to support him as well.

Which extended to his baby-mama, "Excellent! I'll arrange it as soon as possible. If a full day's shoot is available, would you mind the opportunity for double the clothing?"

"I am sure that would being to the okay," Val glanced to her man, whose laid back, both arms along the bench top posture spoke no objections. "Thank you, Monique."

"Great," the dark girl grinned. _Now to mine for some gold…,_ "So, I hear that you've been dreaming of Ron…," turning her head slightly, "what about you?"

Which had the intended effect of catching him off guard, "Huh? Wha?"

"Boy-ee, don't gimme that!" she chided.

Dropping his arms, he hemmed, suddenly realizing his tactical position. _Trapped!_ With his two best friends across from him watching expectantly – the best-est one spearing him with her fieriest of gazes… _Why? What did I do?_ – and the little blonde goddess next to him with a hangdog expression he could do no wrong, also expecting an answer. It felt as if all eyes in the establishment focused on him. Which was a lot of weight. "What's the question?"

"You suddenly dumb as well as deaf?" Monique pressed home, rigging to drill deep. _"She's_ been dreaming of _you_, has there been any dreamage of _her_ on _your_ part?"

A final time he swept their faces: hard glare, mischievous intent, earnest devotion. He could not lie to any of them, but it was the last which dug the deepest.

Turning to face her, he knew those expressively earnest eyes, the face surrounding them and the sun-golden cascade of yellow framing it all. He knew what her modest blue turtleneck sweater enclosed. Not the generic 'all girls have breasts so they should look like' type of knowledge, but the 'actually seen and touched' first hand type. He _knew_, without the slightest of doubt…, "You have the tails-side image of a King Olav the Fifth ten kroner coin – 1988, the year you were born, and we share birth dates – right here…," without the least objection she allowed him to reach across and touch her left breast, low and inside, "accidentally branded there when your house burned down when you were eleven… ."

Almost tearing with joy, biting lower lip, she enthusiastically nodded wordlessly before sweeping him into an embrace even fiercer than when they first met. _"Ja, min kjærlighet, ja! Du husker!" Yes, my love, Yes! You remember!_

Breathing in her clean-linen scent, stroking her hair, he replied, _"Selvfølgelig! Selv om jeg trodde jeg bare drømt om du, hvordan kunne jeg noensinne glemme din perfekt skjønnhet?" Of course! Even though I thought I just had a dream about you, how could I ever forget your perfect beauty?_

Although unable to follow the words, the redheaded hero easily followed the body language. Slumping back, crossing arms, she hissed so low Monique almost thought she imagined it: "Well, _shit."_

* * *

**Notes**: Meet Valkyrie 'Val' Halla. Which is the name I have given to a certain canon **B**ackground **C**haracter. She is the pretty blonde in Norway who looked over Ron's shoulder in _A Sitch in Time: Past_. The one Ron rudely blew off. Why am I spotlighting her? Because she had very nice design and is one of the prettiest of the BCs.

So, what am I doing with her? It is my personal belief that Ron, as the prophesied Ultimate Monkey Master (_Monkey Ninjas in Space_) of the Mystical Monkey Power is also the Sire of the Prophesied Ultimate Weapon, The Han (_Oh No Yono!_) which turned out to be Hana – whom I further believe to be Yori's daughter by him. She was probably being all ninja-ry about it all and _schtuuped_ him after drugging him. Or while in deep meditations. Either way he doesn't full remember them as any more than fantasies.

However prophesies are funny things. Often vague, they are open to multiple and back-up interpretations. Meaning despite (my idea of) Yori having been raised from birth prepared for the sacred duty of bearing The Han, Hana is not the only Han out there. I've identified from canon at least seven young ladies which Ron – normal hormonal teenaged boy, not super-stud – had high opportunity to hook up with. Among them Missy & 'Sippy' (the latter my name) from _Golden Years_. Since this is Prophesy at work, regardless of how many times he might have been with any of these gals, it only took the first shot to knock a Han into them. Val got twins to even out the genders of the kids.

This little concept of mine regarding Ron and these prophesies I call _**The Han Dynasty**_. That's not a title for any one story as it is how I see Ron in _ALL_ of my versions of the Kim Possible Universe(s). _Even __**K/R**__ and __**Canon**_. I particularly like it because as I'm not at this time doing any K/Rs, I feel Ron needs compensation for his time and loyalty. Really, I DO like him. Just not for Kim's love interest.

Which, BTW, is my professional opinion of them as a couple as a Real Life relationship therapist, as the Show Presents Them. And it's not all Ron's failing, Kim is bad for him too. I have a forum if you wish to hash any of this out, so please don't flame the reviews.

Anywho… Liking the Norwegian girl's design, I added her to the Dynasty. Gave names to both her and her town in Norway. Making it a parallel to Middleton, I went with Midgård. And the insanity I call a mind also has ideas to capitalize upon that. Just probably not here.

I posit that after breaking up the team, Ron lived there for six months before time-traveling Rufus 3000 gave him a time-traveling lift to help Kim in the Past. Ample time to get to know this pretty girl with the pretty smile and, y'knau, _Hook Up._

However, along comes the rest of ASiT, the timeline gets reset, and the alternate timeframe of his experiences in Norway never happened. No harm, no foul. Right? Wrong. Just as somehow Ron remembered his hatred of meatcakes, his children growing within Val were also protected. All, I say, by MMP… which is also the power behind the _Tempus Simia_ idol. Time divergence by the power of MMP, protection through the reset by MMP.

According to the internal chronology of the show as I subscribe to, this is set about 2 months prior to_ So The Drama _andjust before_ Gorilla Fist_, so looks like I'll be straying into AU territory. This particular spotlighting of Val started as a series of back-and-forth vignette 'cookies' on the KP Slash Haven (dot) Net, with the member **Pesterfield**, who has done some some segments which prompted more and more slices from me in return. I've incorporated and fleshed out his parts, and thus he gets credited as _Inspiration and Motivator_. Some industries call that a _Producer_.

Ron's House. The opening of _Larry's Birthday_ establishes it as next door to Kim's. How we went three and a half seasons without knowing _that_ detail, I'll never know…

Yes, trotting out my _That's So Raven_ version of Monique again. Actually, all of my Moniques have the same abilities even if it doesn't come up openly in a story, but sometimes, if you know what to look for, you'll catch hints of it.

A _Go Prize _to the first in a review of this chapter to state the inspirational source of Kim and Monique's "benefits" scene.


End file.
